'Hey Lindsey, people are still eating food right now': Neighbors disagree over potluck etiquette after woman takes an entire tray of food to go

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    AITA for calling out my neighbor, who tried to take home all of my neighbor's chicken tikka masala at the beginning of our potluck?
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    Last weekend I invited my neighbors over for a potluck / pool party, nothing big just the neighbors in my culdesac. Everyone has kids around the same age so it was a good time for everyone. There is this Indian couple that lives near us call them Pooja & Jim. Now Pooja's cooking is incredible and she brought over some somosas and chicken tikka masala. Samosas as the appetizer and chicken tikka for lunch.
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    Now we have this other neighbor call her Lindsey. Lindsey loves Pooja's cooking. When it came to the samosas her and her husband really went to town on in my them. It was a bit opinion filling up your plate with them, not everyone got to have some. I didn't say anything.
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    But this is what got annoying when I opened up the food for lunch Lindsey first takes a big plate of food. And then 5 minutes later, she says she and her family have to go home, and that she is gonna take some food back with her. I was like sure, and then the entire aluminum tray of chicken tikka (that people are still taking food from) she tries to take.
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    I was like okay this is a bit too much, I was like hey Lindsey, people are still eating food right now. I'll have my son bring you guys over after people are done. She then gets mad saying that she brought a big tray of muffins (she didn't even bake these they are from Costco). And that she is just taking her fair share. It got really weird, it was like she just got super territorial of the food.
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    And says that I am targeting her. My wife steps in and is like no we just want to make sure there is food for everyone. She then starts angry crying, puts the food back and says we humiliated her and that we only did this because she is fat girl.
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    Pooja and Jim step in and they are like no no its okay you can take the food, we can make some more its no worries. And if we are low on food we will just order pizza. Lindsey leaves and her children leave shortly after.
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    I didn't want to humiliate Lindsey, I just wanted to ensure that there was enough food for everyone. And its just leaving a party early and then taking a lot of the food with you. Pooja tells me that I shouldn't have said anything that she is actually flattered that Lindsey likes my food that much.
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    [deleted] NTA. Amazed that she went to crying when she knew she was in the wrong. Just because you bring a tray to a potluck doesn't mean you are allowed to leave and take another tray without consent.
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    Usrname52 NTA Lindsey was acting super entitled and I'm sure that everyone else thought so and was happy for you calling her out. It sounds like she showed up just to take food.
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    Pooja seems really sweet, but I don't really like her response. People at the party liked the food, and I'd be kind of upset if someone took the good food and I ended up with pizza instead (also, who would pay for the pizza?)
  • 13
    [del... NTA. Who goes to a potluck expecting to take food home? Being able to enjoy the food everyone else brought is the "fair share" of food you get from a potluck. Also, the distribution of leftovers is usually left to the host/whoever brought the dish. You really just said aloud what everyone was probably already thinking.
  • 14
    RoyallyOakie NTA...Awkward? Yes. But it was awkward because she violated the boundaries and basic public manners of eating with others. If you have to tell someone to let everyone eat before they take the food, they deserve to be called out.
  • 15
    Beautiful_mistakes NTA TBH I wouldn't invite them to any more potlucks. And when they ask tell them exactly why. The food is there for people to share. Not to take home for just themselves. How and tacky.
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    Himalayankitten NTA. Any leftovers should go to the person that brought the food or the host (since they have to clean up afterwards).
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